“NOBODY has a perfect all-the-time marriage,” renowned family law attorney Laura Wasser once said on a podcast with HelloPrenup. Spoiler alert: This is why getting a prenup helps provide you and your partner with the tools to navigate the ups and downs of marriage. Having that difficult conversation upfront gives you the “toolbox” (as Wasser astutely puts it) to talk to your partner about the tough stuff. Laura Wasser, a managing partner of Wasser, Cooperman, Mandles and Divorce.com’s Chief of Divorce Evolution, sits down with HelloPrenup CEO Julia Rodgers and CMO Lauren Lavendar to discuss all things prenups, love, and relationships. Let’s dive into Wasser’s thoughts on prenups.
Wasser’s advice on asking your partner for a prenup
Laura Wasser encourages open communication about finances early in a relationship, even if it feels daunting.
“A lot of men call and say I really want to have this conversation, but I don’t know how to do it, and I’m afraid she’s going to be angry. Here’s the thing, if you’re going to be married for a long time and you’re going to have kids with this person, you’re going to be in the delivery room with her when she’s having a baby, you need to be able to talk to her about difficult subjects.”
She argues that if couples can navigate difficult conversations like a prenuptial agreement while still in the “honeymoon phase,” they will be better equipped to handle challenges later in the marriage. Wasser emphasizes that no marriage is perfect, and disagreements are inevitable, whether about finances, family, or children. By establishing a foundation of open communication from the beginning, couples can develop the tools they need to address these issues constructively. She believes that broaching the topic of a prenup should be seen as an opportunity to build communication skills and strengthen the relationship rather than a source of conflict.
Wasser’s thoughts on why women need prenups
On the podcast with HelloPrenup, Laura Wasser said that she believes women are often reluctant to discuss financial matters in general, especially when they are the primary breadwinners. This reluctance, she argues, stems from a desire to avoid embarrassing or emasculating their male partners. However, this avoidance can lead to resentment on both sides. The partner earning less may feel inadequate, while the higher-earning partner may feel unappreciated for their contributions. Wasser emphasizes that open communication about finances is crucial to a healthy relationship. A prenuptial agreement, she suggests, facilitates this conversation by clearly outlining financial expectations and responsibilities from the outset. This transparency can prevent misunderstandings and resentment from festering. Wasser acknowledges that circumstances may change during a marriage, such as one partner becoming a stay-at-home parent. In these cases, she advises revisiting and adjusting the prenup to ensure fairness and equity, a conversation made easier by the initial openness established before the marriage.
“What if we don’t have any money, should we still get a prenup?” – Laura Wasser weighs in
People often (incorrectly) believe that if they don’t have any assets, they don’t need a prenup. Wasser explains why that’s not true: She believes that even couples with limited assets should consider a prenup because it’s not just about protecting existing wealth but also about setting expectations for the future marriage. Wasser points out that circumstances can change dramatically, and couples who start with little may find one partner achieving significant financial success.
In addition, she uses family money as an example for getting a prenup even if a couple doesn’t have money now. She explained that she has a lot of clients who have family wealth, which ordinarily is separate property in divorce, however, if you’re living off of the family wealth as a couple, it could potentially be used to pay for spousal support or child support in a California divorce. Wasser explains that the couple needs to be able to have the conversation about how the family wealth will play into the marital funds and what happens if they split.
Laura Wasser’s thoughts on HelloPrenup
Wasser advocates for platforms like HelloPrenup that make prenuptial agreements accessible and affordable, dispelling the myth that they are only for the wealthy. She said many people think to themselves, “Oh I can’t afford a prenup that’s going to be $25,000, why would I spend the money I otherwise would spend on my first house down payment or a wedding or a honeymoon on a prenup, especially when we’re in love and we’re going to be married forever.” However, even if you’re okay with the default laws of your state and whatever the outcome of a divorce is, Wasser believes the value of a prenup lies in facilitating open communication about finances, ensuring both partners are fully informed and aligned, regardless of their current financial situation.
Nicole Sheehey is the Head of Legal Content at HelloPrenup, and an Illinois licensed attorney. She has a wealth of knowledge and experience when it comes to prenuptial agreements. Nicole has Juris Doctor from John Marshall Law School. She has a deep understanding of the legal and financial implications of prenuptial agreements, and enjoys writing and collaborating with other attorneys on the nuances of the law. Nicole is passionate about helping couples locate the information they need when it comes to prenuptial agreements. You can reach Nicole here: Nicole@Helloprenup.com
0 Comments