So you and your partner are on even footing. You make roughly the same income. You both have similar savings or maybe similarly sized student loans. Neither of you is coming into the relationship with a trust fund or a house in Malibu. And since you’re financial equals, you might be asking: Why would we ever need a prenup? It’s a common question, and a totally fair one. But the assumption behind it, that prenups are only for the rich or the lopsided, isn’t just outdated. It’s risky. The truth is, even couples with equal finances can benefit significantly from a prenuptial agreement. In fact, it can be argued that especially those financially aligned couples should consider one. But, can you tell me the reasons why we should get a prenup if our finances are on equal footing? And, is it common for people to get prenups? Let’s find the answers to your questions and learn more about prenuptial agreements.
Life changes, and so do finances
Let’s start with the obvious. Just because your finances are equal now doesn’t mean they’ll stay that way! Marriage isn’t a snapshot. It’s a moving picture. Over time, someone may start a business. Someone might take time off to raise kids. One of you might receive an inheritance, or go back to school, or get a big promotion. And as the financial gap grows, whether in earnings, debt, or time spent caregiving, the question of what’s “fair” becomes harder to answer.
A prenup can give you both clarity about how to handle those changes before emotions or hindsight complicate things. It lets you define what counts as separate versus shared, how future income or assets should be treated, and what protections should be in place if one partner makes a sacrifice like pausing a career to support the other. A prenup isn’t hedging your bets in case you end up in a divorce, it’s preparing you and your partner for life during the marriage and beyond. And you’re doing it together with open and honest conversations about finances and expectations before you start your life together. What a wonderful precedent to set for your marriage!
State laws don’t always treat “equal” as equal
Even if you split everything 50/50 in your relationship, your state may not. That’s because property division in a divorce depends heavily on where you live. You might be surprised by how different those rules are. Most states follow what’s called “equitable distribution,” which means a court decides what’s fair in dividing property, not necessarily what’s equal. For example, in Pennsylvania, the court looks at approximately 11 different factors when dividing marital property. Everything from income to health to who will have custody of the kids is factored in. Even if your finances were equal going in, one of you could walk away with significantly more.
A handful of states, including California, Texas, and Washington, follow “community property” rules. In these states, most assets acquired during the marriage are considered jointly owned and split 50/50. But that doesn’t necessarily make things simpler. If you start a business during the marriage, it may be considered community property even if one partner built it solo. A prenup lets you change the default rules and decide together what you believe is fair.
And if you move? Good luck. You could end up subject to entirely different laws if you divorce in a different state. That’s why 28 states and Washington, D.C. have adopted some version of the Uniform Premarital Agreement Act (UPAA), which helps ensure prenups are interpreted consistently. But even then, you’re far better off having something in writing than relying on your state’s default rules. By putting your specific intentions and desires in writing, you’re much more likely to control the outcome of a divorce settlement. And, state laws change, so what you think is your state’s default state laws today might not be in the future.
Divorce is expensive, even when you agree
Another reason equal-income couples skip the prenup is that they believe they’ll “just split everything fairly” if things ever go south. No drama, no court. And in a perfect world? Maybe that’s true. But the reality is that divorce, especially without a prenup, can get complicated fast, even for the most amicable couples. Without a prenup, there’s no roadmap. That means you’re more likely to end up negotiating through attorneys, or worse, fighting in court. You’ll divide assets, debts, possibly argue about temporary spousal support. And because the law isn’t as cut-and-dry as people assume, both sides can feel blindsided and overwhelmed. A prenup doesn’t just protect your money, it protects your time, your emotional energy, and your future ability to co-parent or remain on good terms. In fact, many family law attorneys will tell you that prenups often reduce, not increase, conflict. That’s because the hard conversations happen upfront, when everyone’s in a good place and wants the best for each other. And once your prenup is signed, a lot of the big, hard decisions people usually face during a divorce are already sorted out.
A prenup goes deeper than finances
Yes, prenups can protect your assets, but a well-drafted prenup can also reflect the values and priorities of your relationship. Maybe one of you has aging parents you want to provide for. Perhaps you’ve been married before and want to ensure that your children from that marriage are protected. Maybe one of you is bringing in a family business, or you’re planning to adopt, or want to agree in advance how shared property will be handled if someone passes away. A prenup allows you to make space for those personal, emotional, and even spiritual dimensions of your life together. It’s your agreement, personalized to your needs and your values. That’s true whether you’re earning six figures each or just starting out. Together, you and your partner can create a prenup that protects what matters most to both of you.
Alimony can still apply even when incomes match
Another myth is that if you and your partner make the same amount of income, no one will ever have to pay alimony. But that’s not always the case. Most states allow courts to award spousal support based on a variety of factors, including future earning potential, health, sacrifices made during the marriage, or even disparities that arise over time. For instance, if one of you stays home to raise kids or moves across the country for the other’s job, that could create a need for support down the road. Without a prenup that lays out how alimony will or won’t be handled, the decision is left up to the court. And some states have specific rules about spousal support. California, for example, won’t enforce a prenup that limits alimony unless both parties had independent counsel and met other strict requirements. Texas is well known as being extremely conservative in awarding alimony and will rarely consider it unless the marriage has lasted over ten years. This state also puts ceilings on monthly alimony amounts. If you’re curious about the spousal support laws in your state, talk to an experienced family law attorney for guidance.
Millennials and Gen Z are normalizing prenups
The idea that prenups are helpful and important isn’t just legal theory, it’s happening across the country. An Axios poll shows that approximately 47% of millennial American respondents have signed a prenup. This number is a significant increase from decades prior. The biggest surge has been seen in Millennials and Gen Z, who are treating prenups not as taboo, but as a smart, modern part of planning a life together. Interestingly, women are increasingly initiating prenups. They’re doing this not just to protect themselves, but to foster transparency. Many couples see prenups as a relationship-strengthening tool. They force important conversations around debt, career plans, real estate, children, and what happens if one of you needs to take a step back from work. In an era where love is equal, financial planning should be too.
Bottom line on why you should get a prenup even if you have equal finances
You don’t need to be rich or financially unbalanced to want a prenup. You just need to care about your future and about each other. Even if your incomes are equal now or your bank accounts mirror one another’s to the cent, a prenup helps you protect the partnership you’re building together. And money is just one aspect of a well-written prenuptial agreement. The document can include many intangible assets and philosophies that emphasize what you and your partner value most. A prenup is a way to make decisions with love now, so you don’t have to make them under stress later.
Nicole Sheehey is the Head of Legal Content at HelloPrenup, and an Illinois licensed attorney. She has a wealth of knowledge and experience when it comes to prenuptial agreements. Nicole has Juris Doctor from John Marshall Law School. She has a deep understanding of the legal and financial implications of prenuptial agreements, and enjoys writing and collaborating with other attorneys on the nuances of the law. Nicole is passionate about helping couples locate the information they need when it comes to prenuptial agreements. You can reach Nicole here: Nicole@Helloprenup.com
0 Comments