Are you thinking about changing your name after tying the knot? Well, you’re in good company! In 2023, 79% of American women chose to change their last names after marriage. But fair warning, the journey from Ms. to Mrs. is a rather detailed process. Regardless, beyond all the paperwork and logistics, it’s a symbolic step that marks the beginning of a new chapter in your life. Let’s explore the steps involved in this process and dispel some common misconceptions along the way.
Does my name automatically change when I get married?
Nope, your name doesn’t magically transform into your spouse’s the moment after you two say, “I do”! (If only it were that simple, tbh). Whether or not you change your name after getting married is completely up to you. It’s like deciding what toppings to put on your pizza—totally your call! Just know that if you do want to switch names, there’s usually a bit of paperwork involved.
Do I have to change my name after I get married?
Only if you want to! There’s no rule saying you have to change your name after getting married (again, it’s completely your decision). In many places, it’s traditional for one partner, usually the woman, to take the other partner’s last name, but it’s not mandatory. Some people like to keep their own name for personal or professional reasons. Whether you keep your birth name, hyphenate, or come up with something completely new, it’s all about what works best for you and your spouse.
Am I still considered a “Mrs.” if I don’t change my name?
Yes, you can still be referred to as Mrs., even if you choose not to change your last name after marriage. The title “Mrs.” traditionally refers to a married woman, regardless of whether she has taken her husband’s last name or not.
Historically, a woman could only use “Mrs.” if she adopted her husband’s first and last name, but times have certainly evolved! Coverture was an old legal concept where, once a woman got married, her legal rights and responsibilities were essentially under her husband’s control. She often couldn’t own property in her own name, make contracts, or take legal actions independently. Over time, these ideas have changed, and women have gained their own legal autonomy (talk about girl power!)
The bottom line? By now, you’ve probably noticed a common theme here—the choice is yours! It’s all a matter of personal preference and what you feel comfortable with. If you prefer to be addressed as Mrs. with your original last name, that’s completely acceptable.
How long after marriage should you change your name?
The good thing is there’s no strict deadline for changing your name after you get married. This gives you some time after the wedding to weigh your options until you reach a final decision. Some people do it right away, while others take their time. It really depends on your preferences and what’s convenient for you. Whenever you’re ready to pull the name change trigger, just make sure to research and follow the required procedures in your state.
How do you write your maiden name and married name?
Decisions, decisions! Time to choose your new legal identity—no pressure at all, right?! After you get married, how you decide to write your name is entirely up to you and what you decide with your spouse. Let’s take a look at a few common options:
- Keep Your Maiden Name: You can continue to use your maiden (birth) name without any changes. Easy peasy.
- Take Your Spouse’s Last Name: Take your spouse’s last name as your own last name (more on how to do this later).
- Hyphenate: Combine your maiden name and your spouse’s last name with a hyphen (Example: Lisa Marie Frank marries Tom Jones. After marriage, Lisa can hyphenate her name to Lisa Marie Frank-Jones).
- Use Both Last Names: Keep your maiden name and add your spouse’s last name without a hyphen (Example: Lisa can change her name to Lisa Marie Frank Jones without adding a hyphen).
- Use Your Maiden Name as a Middle Name: Some people choose to move their maiden name to their middle name and take their spouse’s last name as their last name (Example: Lisa can replace her middle name, Marie, with her maiden name, Frank. Lisa can also take her spouse’s last name, Jones, as her new last name. After marriage, Lisa Marie Frank can become Lisa Frank Jones.
Ultimately, the choice is yours as this is an intensely personal decision. Once you decide, you can then update your identification, social security, bank accounts, and other official documents as necessary.
What steps do I need to take to change my last name after I get married?
It’s a good idea to check your state’s name change requirements even before you get married. Some states, like Georgia, require a formal petition to be filed with the court if you wait until after your wedding to request a name change. Typically, however, the process involves administrative steps rather than a formal court filing. Here’s how the name change process generally works:
- Step 1: Decide on Your New Name. This step may be fairly obvious, but it bears mentioning. Choose whether you want to take your spouse’s last name, hyphenate both last names, use both last names without a hyphen, or keep your maiden name.
- Step 2: Grab Your Marriage Certificate. Make sure you have a certified copy of your marriage certificate handy. It’s like your golden ticket for the name-change game!
- Step 3: Consider Publication Requirements. Some states require name change petitions to be published in a local newspaper to notify the public. Check with your local court or government office to determine if this step is necessary in your state.
- Step 4: Update Your Social Security Card. Fill out a form (Form SS-5) from the Social Security Administration (SSA). Include your marriage certificate and proof of identity (like a passport or driver’s license). You can mail it or submit it in person at your local SSA office. You should receive a copy of your new Social Security card within 10-14 business days.
- Step 5: Update Your Passport. If you have a passport, you’ll need to apply for a new one with your new name once you receive your new Social Security card. Complete Form DS-5504 or DS-82 (depending on your eligibility), provide your current passport, a certified copy of your marriage certificate or court order, and any required fees to the U.S. Department of State.
- Step 6: Update Your Driver’s License or ID. Visit the DMV with your current license or ID, marriage certificate, or court order, and any other required documents. Fill out the forms they give you to update your name.
- Step 7: Vehicle Title and Registration. Contact your county tag office to change your name on your vehicle’s title and registration.
- Step 8: Notify Your Creditors and Service Providers. Inform any creditors, utility companies, subscription services, and others of your name change. This ensures that you’re still being billed properly.
- Step 9: Update Your Other Accounts and Documents. Contact your bank, insurance companies, employer/HR, and anyone else you have accounts with. Give them your new name and any required paperwork.
- Step 10: Keep Tabs on the Switch. Record all the places you’ve notified about your name change and follow up to ensure everything is updated correctly.
If you’re still reading by this point, give yourself a pat on the back! Changing your name after tying the knot is no small feat. Remember to research and comply with the specific procedures and legal requirements in your state to make the change official. Each state has variations on the process, so check with your local county court or government agency to make the process as seamless as possible for you.
Alternatively, if this all feels a little too overwhelming, a company called HitchSwitch offers name-change packages that help streamline the process for you.
The bottom line on changing your name after marriage
Changing your name after marriage is a big decision! It’s certainly not a process that can be accomplished overnight. Whether you choose to take your spouse’s last name, hyphenate, or keep your maiden name, it’s important to be aware of your state’s requirements. The last thing you want to do is complete steps that you may not need to, or worse, fail to complete a required step. But while the administrative tasks may seem daunting, it marks the start of a new part of your life’s story. Remember, it’s a journey you can navigate at your own pace to create an identity that’s uniquely you.
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