After a failed marriage, remarrying can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. Finding love again can be tough, especially after a tough divorce. However, remarrying is an exciting step in your future! For many, remarrying comes with extra precautions. Due to the mistakes made the first go around, some people enter second marriages with extra hesitation.
When it comes to prenups, conversations around remarriages can get a bit tricky. Perhaps you had a prenuptial agreement from your first marriage. Or maybe you didn’t have one and regret it. Regardless of your situation, you’re likely to have some questions about prenups and remarriages, so let’s debrief!
Why Second Marriages May End in Divorce
After your first marriage has dissolved, feelings of being hopeless or worried about starting a new marriage are understandable. But by understanding many of the common reasons why second and subsequent marriages fail, you and your partner can be aware, and keep these in mind when moving forward in your amazing future!
Some common reasons to be aware of on why second marriages may fail include:
- Having already been married may be more likely to divorce at the first sign of a problem. This is because these people may have a “been there, done that” attitude. With this mindset, individuals believe they made it successful through one divorce, therefore, they can do it again if needed.
- One or both couples have baggage from previous marriages/divorces that they cannot or don’t have the capacity to work through. This emotional damage or baggage can come in the way of the current relationship.
- One or both couples have remarried too quickly after the last divorce. Whether it’s a quick rebound or feeling lost, some people find they need time on their own before rushing into a new marriage.
- If you had children with your previous spouse, this may have been something to tie the family together. Perhaps this is why you may have tried harder to keep the marriage afloat. However, when you remarry, you and your new partner will have to navigate new waters.
- One or both partners had children from the previous marriage. Becoming a step parent and juggling new additions to your life can at times be overwhelming and stressful.
- Financial issues from the last marriage such as spousal support or child support.
Although research suggests many second marriages (up to 60%) are often in divorce, this doesn’t have to be true for you and your partner. Sitting down with your future spouse and discussing these points during a prenup conversation can help prepare you both for success in your second marriage.
Financial Considerations for Second Marriages
Though this may not be what you want to hear, statistics show that couples with one or both partners who have previously been divorced are more likely to divorce again. While there is no way to tell what the future holds, you probably didn’t think you’d get divorced, to begin with. Whether you had a prenup for your first marriage or not, creating a prenup for your next marriage may be worth consideration.
Research indicates only around 5% of couples have a prenuptial agreement in place before marriage. However, the divorce rate in the United States is far higher! Each year, statistics vary, but the 2021 divorce rate was around 50%. Not only do 50% of all marriages end in divorce or separation, but 41% of all first marriages will end in divorce. For second marriages, 60% end in divorce.
As you examine these statistics, you have to remember they’re only numbers! These numbers do not suggest that you and your next partner are bound to divorce. Some people actually believe that a past failed marriage helps prepare a person more for a second marriage.
What if I had a Prenup from my First Marriage?
If you had a prenup from your first marriage, you were probably glad it was in place. When you were going through the divorce, it likely made things easier to divide for you and your ex-spouse. While you and your partner once hoped to never use that prenuptial agreement, clearly things changed. This is why a prenuptial agreement should be looked at like an insurance policy. It’s there only if you need it.
If your divorce is official, your old prenup will not affect your ability to create a new one with your new partner.
Prenups for Second (or Third) Marriages
Before you dismiss the idea of a prenuptial agreement for your second or third marriage, consider this. If you’re remarrying, chances are you’re an older individual. As such, you’re likely to have accumulated more assets than you had back in your 20s. Maybe you own a business or anticipate an incoming family inheritance. Regardless of your circumstances, a prenup can protect any assets you do have. This includes retirement savings!
Another reason many couples choose to get a prenup when they remarry is for their children from a past marriage. Whether one or both of you have children from a past marriage, a prenup can help protect assets you want to pass down. Though you may welcome your incoming step-children with open arms, some people still wish to leave specific assets to their children. This can be added as a clause in your prenuptial agreement to ensure the things you want are left to your children.
While a prenup is not a magic piece of paper that can solve everything, its an agreement that can clear the air and set you up for success in the long run!
Writing a Prenup
Don’t want to be bothered with the time and money it takes to involve a lawyer in drafting a prenup for your second marriage? Consider a quicker and easier way through HelloPrenup. To get started, you and your partner will complete a questionnaire to get in touch with the things you want to be included in your prenup.
Created to save you and your partners time and energy on the traditional complicated prenup process, HelloPrenup was designed to make the process of online prenuptial agreements easy and simple for couples like you. Each prenup is designed with the specific laws of each state in mind. In under two hours, you can quickly create an “insurance plan” for your second marriage. This reassurance helps those who are hesitant about remarrying feel a little more at ease!
Julia Rodgers is HelloPrenup’s CEO and Co-Founder. She is a Massachusetts family law attorney and true believer in the value of prenuptial agreements. HelloPrenup was created with the goal of automating the prenup process, making it more collaborative, time efficient and cost effective. Julia believes that a healthy marriage is one in which couples can openly communicate about finances and life goals. You can read more about us here Questions? Reach out to Julia directly at [email protected].