Getting engaged to the love of your life, and realizing you are going to spend the rest of your life with your person is such an exciting moment in life. After you share the news with family and friends, and post your “I said yes!” picture on social media, all the wedding related questions start pouring in and everyone tends to focus on the big day ahead. Wedding questions aren’t a bad thing whatsoever, but wouldn’t it be nice if you had loved ones sharing pieces of advice for you as a newly engaged couple? Just in case you don’t have a grandma or beloved matron of honor sharing these helpful bits of guidance, we have compiled a short list for you!
Communication is Key
If you have ever received any advice relating to engagement or marriage, it has probably had something to do with communication being the golden ticket to any successful marriage. During this season of being an engaged couple, and then leading into spending the rest of your lives together post wedding, there is and always will be a lot to talk about.
Being able to openly communicate with one another about issues in life that are both big and small will help to facilitate a happier and healthier relationship. This isn’t to say you always have to agree on everything, but knowing how to talk about various things instead of just sweeping them under the rug is key. Here are some examples of both wedding and non-wedding related topics you and your fiance should make sure to discuss asap.
Wedding related topics to bring up:
- How long you want to be engaged
- Budget for your wedding
- Overall vision for the big day (style, guest count, location, date)
Big life topics to start with:
- Finances (Learning how to manage financial differences in a relationship is crucial!)
- Short term and long term goals
- Family planning (do you want kids, how many, etc.)
Don’t Let Wedding Planning Consume You
Although it might not feel like it when you are in the thick of it, but your engagement, the build up to the wedding day, and the big day itself is such a short blip of time in your life. After you get engaged, it is only natural that you will want to (and need to) start planning how you want your ceremony to look. Whether you live for this type of thing or you are completely in over your head, wedding planning is a stressful process, but remember to put your mental health first when doing all the planning!
Being engaged is more than just planning your wedding, it really is the start of a new life that you and your partner are building together. It is important to remember to take a step back every so often and not let wedding planning consume your every thought. When the wedding is over, your partner will still be by your side, so be sure to put that same love, attention, and effort into your relationship as well.
Prenups For the Win
Most couples who have a prenup in place would probably advise anyone that is getting married to secure one for themselves. In case you are unfamiliar, prenuptial agreements are a signed legal document that allows for both parties to decide for themselves how they want their finances, property, and other assets to be divided in the event of a divorce or death. In the United States, nearly 50% of marriages will end in divorce. Of course nobody goes into a marriage planning to eventually get divorced, but this is a very eye opening statistic, and makes the act of securing your own prenup all that more important.
Another thing to keep in mind is that a prenup can only be created before you get married. If you and your fiance haven’t yet discussed the benefits of having a prenup and you don’t know where to start, check out the ABC’s you need to get the discussion started.
Teamwork Makes the Dream Work
Understanding what you and your partner need from each other in order to have a happy and healthy marriage is a piece of advice you don’t want to ignore. Being aware of how you handle conflict, your emotions, your strengths, and your weaknesses will allow both of you to better understand each other and be able to accomplish more as a married couple. Going through life together will have its challenges, but it will also be rewarding and exciting if you stand by one another through the highs and lows.
If you haven’t yet already, you and your soon-to-be spouse should take a moment and figure out what your Love Languages are. Learning about you and your partners love languages can bring you even closer!
Keep Dating Each Other
Just because you are engaged to be married doesn’t mean the fun of going on dates and pursuing one another has to stop now, or ever! Being mindful of dating your spouse after you say “I do!” is not only a great way to stay emotionally connected, but it will also allow the two of you to carve out time with one another and make new memories as a married couple.
A fun way to take this piece of advice and actually apply it, is by taking turns planning a date for each other. Remember, going on dates doesn’t have to be expensive or extravagant, it’s just important that you dedicate time to each other every so often. There are many activities you can do together that don’t include just sating at home!
Final Thoughts
After getting engaged, couples are likely to be bombarded with a lot of questions and bits of advice surrounding their actual wedding day. While this can be helpful, it is even more helpful for a couple to receive meaningful advice relating to having a happy and healthy relationship entering this new stage of life.
From the five pieces of advice listed above, which stuck out to you most? If it was signing a prenup of your own with your partner, HelloPrenup is here to help! By using HelloPrenup you can create a fast, affordable, and actually enjoyable prenuptial agreement from the comfort of your own home! Ready to get started? Create an account with us and get started on your prenup today.
Julia Rodgers is HelloPrenup’s CEO and Co-Founder. She is a Massachusetts family law attorney and true believer in the value of prenuptial agreements. HelloPrenup was created with the goal of automating the prenup process, making it more collaborative, time efficient and cost effective. Julia believes that a healthy marriage is one in which couples can openly communicate about finances and life goals. You can read more about us here Questions? Reach out to Julia directly at [email protected].
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